I WROTE A POEM ABOUT DIETS

It’s not the honey

On your morning oats, It’s not even the dressing on your salad. That’s ruining your weight loss attempts, That’s forcing you off track, Or making your gym attempts invalid.

It’s all the stopping and starting, And having end points, That’s preventing your results from being seen. It’s the all or nothing approaches, The rules and restrictions, Stay with me and I’ll explain what I mean.

If what your doing at the moment with your training and food, You simply cannot sustain forever. Then you are more likely to stumble And most probably fall, On your perpetual fat loss endeavour.

So what if in place of the diet this time, You just skipped the whole diet idea. And what if instead, to see your abs or guns, You simply eat like an adult ALL YEAR.

You eat a whole range of colourful plants, That came from the trees and the ground. You drank enough water for your body to stay moist, And to push all those nutrients around.

You have some lean protein, Every 4 or so hours, And get a bit more sleep each night. Because without sleep you haven’t a chance in hell, You’ll devour all the junk food in sight.

You save treats for special occasions, And have one glass of red, Instead of the entire bottle. You control what you can, and mange what you can’t, Because it’s ok not to go full throttle.

If the approach your taking currently Slightly dulls your mood, Or makes life seem a lot less sweeter, Then return the mayo into you sandwich, Put some milk in your coffee, And add the bacon bits back in your ceaser.

By keeping things you like, You will last longer, Because you won’t feel so restricted. You’ll relax around food, And feel much stronger, But best of all your spirits will be lifted.

If you disagree with what I’m saying, And think you need to be strict, Then go ahead and take the balls to wall approach. But it sure as hell didn’t work or me, And I wouldn’t prescribe it to you, Or any human that I care about or coach.

You don’t need ketones, or magic juices, To enhance the way that you look. You don’t need to be clever, And reinvent the wheel, Or rewrite any nutrition book.

This way your results may be slower, But are more likely to last, Because you’ll avoid the point when you say. “Screw this shit I’ll have 2 burgers with the lot, Diet starts again on Monday!”